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Best and Famous Jack Handey quotes. "I hope that after I die, people will say of me, That guy sure owed me a lot of money.". ( Jack Handey) "If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is, 'God is crying.'. And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is, 'Probably because of something.
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4. "Love can sweep you off your feet and carry you along in a way you've never known before. But the ride always ends, and you end up feeling lonely and bitter. Wait. It's not love I'm describing.
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Jack Handey is a solidly built man of 64 with a swoop of graying hair; when he smiles, his teeth are blindingly white. We were sitting around the island in Handey's Santa Fe kitchen as his wife.
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Jack Handey. When you go to a party at somebody's house, don't automatically assume that the drinks are free. Ask, and ask often. Jack Handey. When the age of the Vikings came to a close, they must have sensed it. Probably, they gathered together one evening, slapped each other on the back and said, 'Hey, good job.'.
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1. "I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it". - Jack Handey. 2. "I think the monkeys at the zoo should have to wear sunglasses so they can't hypnotize you." - Jack Handey. 3. "Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself. Basically, it's made up of two separate words — 'mank' and 'ind.'.
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And also, you're drunk." Jack Handey. "A man doesn't automatically get my respect. He has to get down in the dirt and beg for it." Jack Handey. "Ambition is like a frog sitting on a Venus's-flytrap. The flytrap can bite and bite, but it won't bother the frog because it only has little tiny plant teeth.
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4 quotes from Jack Handey: 'If you're in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at the enemy, throw one of those small pumpkins. Maybe it'll make everyone think how stupid war is, and while they are thinking, you can throw a real grenade at them.', 'It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.', and 'Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I.
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21 of the most memorable Deep Thoughts With Jack Handey quotes. "Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey" was a staple of comedy for many of us years ago, so in our ongoing quest to pay homage to the popular quotes of our favorite men, today we take a look back at a few of the greatest Jack Handey quotes. As an SNL veteran writer and comedic genius.
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Jack Handey (born 25 February 1949) is an American humorist. He is most famous for his Deep Thoughts , a large corpus of surrealistic one-liner jokes. Deep Thoughts were first seen in small comedy magazine Army Man Comics edited by George Meyer and continued in National Lampoon in 1984 though gained popularity when they were read on Saturday.
Jack Handey Quote I hope life isn't a big joke, because I
Jack Handey. Jack Handey (born February 25, 1949) is an American humorist. He is best known for his "Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey", a large body of surrealistic one-liner jokes, as well as his "Fuzzy Memories" and "My Big Thick Novel" shorts, and for his deadpan delivery. [1] Although many assume otherwise, [2] [3] Handey is a real person, not.
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We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.". "Sometimes I think you have to march right in and demand your rights, even if you don't know what your rights are, or who the person is you're talking to. Then on the way out, slam the door.". "I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate.
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10 Sourced Quotes. If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because man, they're gone. Jack Handey. To me clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kind of scary. I've wondered where this started and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus and a clown killed my dad. Jack Handey.
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Collection of sourced quotations from Deep Thoughts (1992) by Jack Handey. Share with your friends the best quotes from Deep Thoughts. Authors. Topics. Lists. Pictures. Resources. More about Jack Handey. Jack Handey - Deep Thoughts (1992) 7 Sourced Quotes. View all Jack Handey Quotes. Source; Report. To me clowns aren't funny. In fact, they.
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Jack Handey Quotes. I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world because they'd never expect it. "Deep Thoughts" by Jack Handey, Berkley Publishing Group, 1992. Discover Jack Handey famous and rare quotes. Share funny quotes by Jack Handey and quotations about cars and waiting.
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106 books. view quotes. Feb 10, 2013 10:03PM. Jack Handy — 'It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.'.
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Jack Handey. 1. Copy. Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink, I feel shame! Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work, and their dreams would be shattered.